Blessings and Contentment

Fell ill with high fever while Adrian was in KL on business. It was a tough struggle, especially watching over the kids to do homework and settling their meals, not to mention picking them from school. Thank God the kids had the sense to call Adrian when I was semi-conscious with high fever and Adrian could SMS Lay Choo and Natalie for help. And thank God for sisters like them, who could throw aside all stuff, came over to help. Natalie actually brought her kids over as Yee Fei wasn't home from work yet, not worrying that I could pass on my germs to the kids especially Xin Tong, who will be sitting for her SA1 soon.

Feel much better now, though the throat and sinus are starting to hurt a lot. But I'm a happy lark, Xin Yi actually asked to stay overnight last night. Risking the possibility of him asking for Natalie in the middle of the night like he did before at Lay Choo's, we left him to stay over as he wished. And he slept well!

Talk about blessings. The sisters in the church are my blessings. And talk about love and reciprocals. Just take a look at the kids' relationships. I've got nothingb else to ask for. I'm fully contented.

Entitlement

It has never occurred to me all my life that I could have the schema aka character defect 'entitlement'. After all, I lived practically all my life pleasing people and trying to get into people's good books as one of my top most priority. It was not until I became a disciple that I came to terms with who I am and God really doesn't care if I worked overtime or suck up to Him. And the schema workshop really opened my eyes wide to the truth about this defectiveness in my character. Yet I found it difficult to accept it as I see myself as a person going all out to please people, not one who expects people to go all out to do things for me.

After becoming a disciple and learning to live my life Christlike, I have become much more open and friendly as a person, even to strangers. It has become much easier to smile from the bottom of my heart, to evangelise, to approach strangers, even just to say hello to an unfriendly neighbour.

Had a quick lunch this afternoon before rushing to school to meet the twins, for today is Natalie's ballet class and we do not get home until about 4pm. After the meal when I was still finishing my drink, the cleaner came to clear up my emptied dish. This particular cleaner has been working at this coffee shop for ages, and is notorious for her bad temper and her grouchy face. I have heard comments like if she ever smiled, Singapore would snow. When she came over to clear my dish, I automatically gave her a smile and thanked her. To my utmost surprise, she went absolutely flabbergasted and stuttered, "You are welcome," in Chinese. And her normally stern and grouchy face broke into an awkward kind of smile like it had long forgotten how its features ought to be arranged in a smile.

This incident had me plunge deep in thoughts. So many people are being taken for granted in their vocation day in day out, especially those in the service industry, more so the lowly educated holding lowly positions.And all it took to make the cleaner's day was a slight smile of appreciation and a simple word of thanks. How much better a place the world would be if only everyone could just make a little effort to bring a smile onto a stranger's face each day. I'm resolved to start bringing a heartfelt smile to at least one stranger's face a day from today onwards. What about you?

Have you checked In?

Dear sisters, decide to post this to remind us to check in today. Love,saltytan

 

A minister passing through his church in the middle of the day

Decided to pause by the altar and see who had come to pray.

Just then the back door opened,  a man came down the aisle

The minister frowned as he saw the man hadn't shaved in a while.

His shirt was kind of shabby and his coat was worn and frayed 

The man knelt, he bowed his head, Then rose and walked away.

In the days that followed, each noon time came this chap

Each time he knelt just for a moment, A lunch pail in his lap.

Well, the minister's suspicions grew, with robbery a main fear

He decided to stop the man and ask him, 'What are you doing here?'

The old man said, he worked down the road.Lunch was half an hour.

Lunchtime was his prayer time, For finding strength and power.

'I stay only moments, see,  because the factory is so far away; as I kneel here talking to the Lord, This is kinda what I say:

'I JUST CAME AGAIN TO TELL YOU, LORD,
HOW HAPPY I'VE BEEN, SINCE WE FOUND EACH OTHER'S FRIENDSHIP AND YOU TOOK AWAY MY SIN.   DON'T KNOW MUCH OF HOW TO PRAY, BUT I THINK ABOUT YOU EVERYDAY. SO, JESUS, THIS IS JIM CHECKING IN TODAY.'

The minister feeling foolish, told Jim, that was fine.

He told the man he was welcome To come and pray just anytime

 

Time to go, Jim smiled, said 'Thanks.' He hurried to the door.   
 The minister knelt at the altar, he'd never done it before.

His cold heart melted, warmed with love, and met with Jesus there.

As the tears flowed, in his heart, he repeated old Jim's prayer:

'I JUST CAME AGAIN TO TELL YOU, LORD,
HOW HAPPY I'VE BEEN, SINCE WE FOUND EACH OTHERS FRIENDSHIP AND YOU TOOK AWAY MY SIN.  I DON'T KNOW MUCH OF HOW TO PRAY, BUT I THINK ABOUT YOU EVERYDAY. SO, JESUS, THIS IS ME CHECKING IN TODAY.'

Past noon one day, the minister noticed that old Jim hadn't come.

As more days passed without Jim, he began to worry some.

At the factory, he asked about him, learning he was ill.

The hospital staff was worried, But he'd given them a thrill.

The week that Jim was with them, Brought hanges in the ward.

His smiles, a joy contagious. Changed people, were his reward.

The head nurse couldn't understand why  Jim was so glad.

When no flowers, calls or cards came, Not a visitor he had.

The minister stayed by his bed, He voiced the nurse's concern:

No friends came to show they cared. He had nowhere to turn.

Looking surprised, old Jim spoke up and with a winsome smile;

 'the nurse is wrong, she couldn't know, that he's in here all the while everyday at noon He's here, a dear friend of mine, you see,
He sits right down, takes my hand, Leans over and says to me: 
 
'I JUST CAME AGAIN TO TELL YOU, JIM,
HOW HAPPY I HAVE BEEN, SINCE WE FOUND THIS FRIENDSHIP, AND I TOOK AWAY YOUR SIN.  ALWAYS LOVE TO HEAR YOU PRAY, I THINK ABOUT YOU EACH DAY, AND SO JIM, THIS IS JESUS CHECKING IN TODAY.' 
 

From Salty Tan

Prayers and Sharings

Great lesson from John and Karen this evening. Guess they've put my innermost thoughts of many years into words. Through their preaching, I realised how much God has blessed me over the years even when I was still a pagan and sinning against Him. He showed me how dysfunctional my own family was, and what I need to do in order to break the vicious cycle and give my children a sound and functioning family. No doubt I still fall into sin's ways for I am imperfect, but I realise it fairly quickly and repent readily and apologise to my husband and kids, so that minimal damage is done. And I praise God for giving me the ability to and instilling in me the idea to get a postgraduate diploma in teaching, for now is the time my kids need me most and I can stay home for them, teach them myself and yet earn extra income for the family by teaching.

I'm glad my kids are sensitive and intelligent kids despite the fact that they can throw unreasonable tantrums at times. They are aware of my actions of evangelising to their friends' parents, and they help me by telling their friends about God. Unfortunately many of their friends are Muslims and are hence unreceptive to the idea, but I'm proud to say they never give up. And I love those cosy moments when we share with one another what we learn on Sundays in church and during our devos (yes, Nathanial is doing his own devo with minimal guidance now!!!). I would share with them the sermons and what I learnt from it including the verses which we will look up in their Bibles, and they in turn would share with me whjat they learnt at Kids' Kingdom. We would then conclude with the lesson we've learnt and a prayer before we retire for the night. This is my favourite time, though sadly it happens just once a week on Sunday. Other nights from Mondays to Thursdays I have tuition and Fridays are for midweek. Really looking forward to the time when they are older and have a later bedtime so that we may share more of such cosy moments together.

Spewaking about cosy moments, I'm toying with the idea of adopting a baby when my kids are older, perhaps in upper primary or lower secondary, when they no longer want me buzzing around their heads. But this is a major decision and Adrian and I really find it hard to come to an agreement with it despite having discussed about it for over 5 years now. Please pray for us to do God's bidding.

Love,
Carol

Hi, an update from me!

Glad I found my way back to the blog. I was feeling so lost without it. No doubt I still carry on with my daily walk with God through journaling, but it is just different from sharing my innermost thoughts with all of you and receiving your encouragements. Praise be to God that technology is so advanced these days and electronic appliances are so cheap in Singapore. I actually got my new Acer AspireOne notebook brand new for S$599,$200 cheaper than market rate for this is my birthday month. Back to civilization!!! Back to listening to songs and blogging at the same time!!! Such is the joy of technology!

For those of you who have been worried about me and my condition, well, I'm not exactly at top form. I have to skip my meds on Fridays and Saturdays so I don't turn zombie the next day and can spend time wityh the family. However this results in instability in my emotions. Just thois afternoon, I went on a manic episode and spent a fortune at Compass Point within a short span of half an hour. How I managed it is beyond my comprehension.

Haven't been exactly a bed of roses either where tuition is concerned. With my emotions roller coastering, obviously I'm not in a top form to teach. Well, fortunately I do have a passion to teach, so I don't shortchange the kids or their parengts. But right after classes I need so many tranquilizers to calm myself down that I fear my nervous system is going to break down soon.

I now have a part time helper as some of you know. A China woman who has settled down in Singapore with her family, she comes once every fortnight to clean the house. It has really taken a great load off my shoulders, for I can't give household chores one of my top priorities. And to make things better, I teach her 4-year-old daughter English while she works for me free of charge. God is such a great God, He knows my exact struggles and provides befitting solutions for them. Amen!

It was a great experience housing brothers and sisters overseas during the SEA Conference. I never believed it until now, but serving really brings a huge learning process to us. It was a sheer pleasure to be able to host a family of 4 and another couple without kids, and just like ZQ said, it was such a disappointment when at the last minute 2 single brothers were sent to Darren and Esther Kwok's place instead. Crammed as it may be, it was a great experience and we enjoyed great fellowship, the sisters, the brothers as well as the kids. I'm already looking forward to the next SEA Conference when I can host more people, perhaps from more challenging countries like Indonesia, Vietnam and Cambodia.

Looking forward to seeing you all tonight at midweek. Next week Adrian will be in KL on business, need your support to carry on, especially with SA1 so near around the corner.

Love,
Carol

I'm Back!!!

I'm back!!!

It's been ages since I last appeared on blogger. My laptop dying on me, it takes a minimum of 15 to 20 minutes just to login. God has a great humour when I asked to be taught patience. Fortunately this is my birthday month and I got hold of a 12.1" Acer Aspire One at $200 off market rate. So be prepared that I'll be bombarding you with all my blogs again!

Miss you and love you all!

Love,
Carol

Wives..be inspired

Dear sisters,

 

below post is on behalf of Helen. Suitable for all wives! Hope you will be inspired.

 

love,sk

 

  I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do, I do not do,
but what I hate I do." Romans 7:15 (NIV)
         
Devotion:
He came home from work, feeling tired I am sure. But instead of complaining, he rolled his sleeves up and jumped right in making french toast and frying bacon for our dinner. As he worked, he told me about the rough day he had--more than 100 people had been laid off at his company. While he had not been laid off, he felt sorry for those who had been, and wondered if he would be on the next list of names.

 

After dinner, he tackled bath times with the younger kids. After they were safely tucked into bed, he took one son with him to the store. He returned home happy, reeling off the things on the list he had gotten for me.
 
"You didn't get the vitamins," I told him. "That was the whole reason you went!" His smile disappeared. Bewildered, he offered to go back out and get the vitamins if we really needed them. "Well, of course we do or I wouldn't have asked for them," I said. He left again. It was late. He was tired.

 

He returned home for the second time, happy again, brandishing an off brand bottle of the vitamins I had asked for. "These were buy one, get one free!" he said, waving two boxes, one in each hand. I took one look at those boxes and sneered.

 

"There are some things you don't bargain shop for," I chided. He slunk off to the kitchen to stow the vitamins in the cabinet, out of sight. Later, he fell asleep on the couch, the book he had attempted to read rising and falling on his chest as he slept.

 

This is an actual scene from life at my house. This morning as I was in prayer, God brought that scene to mind, allowing me to see my ugliness. Here we see this really great guy trying to serve and love and give - and here we see his snippy, unappreciative wife totally dropping the ball on loving and serving him in return. Instead we see how she wants her own way and pouts like a two year-old when she doesn't get it. We see that, once again, her need to say little unnecessary comments surfaces. We see her focusing on the negative and missing so much positive in the process.

 

Today I was reminded again of what I have - and what I stand to lose. My words wound or, at the very least, fall far short of what they could bring to my husband's life. I choose to nitpick instead of nurture. I choose to litigate instead of love. I hate these choices I make, and yet, again and again I go back to this same driving need to plead my case, assert my rights, get my way, and be first. When God asks me to be willing to be last (Mark 9:35). In life.

 

And in marriage I want to do better, to speak kinder, to look for the many good things instead of seizing on the bad. I want to be a wife who brings him good and not harm all the days of her life (Proverbs 31:12). I am working on it, but some days I fall right back into flesh patterns that are so evil and ugly I recoil at my own image when it's played out for me. I know better - I should do better.

 

Tomorrow, I will try again. And, Honey? Thanks for hanging in there on days when I don't.
Dear Lord, help me to honor my husband with my words, my deeds and my thoughts. Help me to realize that my words matter. I can choose to build him up or tear him down. Help me to choose to build him up and give me the strength to do so. In Jesus' Name, Amen.
 

A New student- teaches me gratefulness

Today, I have a new student. She is an 18 year old girl with Down syndrome. She can’t read v well and didn’t speak very well. But she has a sweet smile. Happy, enjoys listening to stories and is so eager to learn.
Her mum said that no school will accept her and she also needs special diet as her daughter has diabetics. Twice a week, she needs to go to the hospital for therapy. Once a week, she goes for her special swimming classes for her physical growth. All these can be costly.

I thank God for putting her in my life. I’m totally convicted. Seeing her makes me feel grateful for what I have. I have 2 beautiful girls. Healthy and able to go to normal steam school. (Sometimes complain in my heart about Verdelle’s dyslexia) My 2 girls can able enjoy activities like ballet, swimming and running and lots of other fun which this girl is not able to do. I asked her if she has a dream. She can’t answer but said that she likes food a lot and enjoys reading books. I told she can be librarian. She looked at me with wide opened eyes.( like telling me, "I can?")

I pray that God will continue to use me to help other kids and even mums who need God’s strength and hope.

Only in God we have hope and have strength to move on the challenging trials in life.

luv

veron